Dealing with the messy aftermath of uninclusive facilitation

I spent about two years looking for an IA tool that worked for my process and my mental model. It was a pretty short list:

User expectations are a moving target. We don’t get to develop in a vacuum and whenever we create, we inherit the entire ecosystem of the user. This is a double edged sword. On the one hand we don’t have to start from scratch in building expectations. However, when our fellow designers begin to abuse useful patterns, our users develop bad expectations and worse habits.

The quintessential beginner’s question for anything technical goes something like this: